Updated: May 27
Make your relationship less toxic: chose to be responsible and clear is one the best strategies.
At the beginning of your relationship you have had a clear idea and opinion about your partner, maybe she or he wasn’t perfect, but you trusted them. Now, the situation is changed, and you are thinking about how you can act and behave within your toxic relationship.
The most important fact is that you need to clarify what you want to do and how to go ahead in your life, building day per day your self-balance and new scopes.
With a clear vision of what you really want is one of the best strategies, but how can you have a clear vision in a situation where everything is confused or manipulated?
A good way is to see inside of yourself and be responsible to take the road you want to allow you to manage better your life, despite you are still living with a toxic partner.
It can happen that you don’t know what to do: unconsciously you could avoid speaking about something important to you and avoiding other conflicts, this can shape you to become complicit.
What does it mean? Avoiding arguments and conflicts or don’t allow yourself to express your ideas or opinion put you at risk, for many reasons. One of the risks is to maintain the status quo that was made by your partner and this doesn’t help you to build the solid pillar of your self-esteem that you need to overcome or solve your toxic relationship; so, be aware how you think and act within your relationship.
A certain situation is like a weapon against you: maybe you can ‘decide’ to lie in avoiding issues or discussions that you think you can’t win.
What I want to suggest you is to act in a way, that you can have a win-win situation with your partner, in this way she or he starts to understand that you aren’t their doormat anymore or the litter bin for their emotions, that punctually, they use you like a sponge that absorbs their issues, worries, etc..
Then you have to consider that telling yourself or others lies is very destructive for your health and psyche, and you can’t lie forever: stress and fears will destroy your life balance, with the fact that this will get worse your relationship.
For your self-esteem is better to understand what is really important, sometimes lying preserves you to feel like a doormat and other times, you have to decide to be strong and avoid lies if you want to become responsible and decide your destiny.